Meminang

The next stage of Malay wedding is the 'meminang' stage which comes after the 'merisik' stage. Now, after confirming the marriage of the young couple, the family members of the male side of the family will  proceed to meet with the family members of the female side of the family in order to confirm the marriage date and time. Besides, the meeting also includes the agreement of the amount of money to be paid by the male side of the family, also known as 'wang belanja'. The meeting also settles the amount of female and male guests for the wedding and the gifts to be presented by the male side and the female side. The gifts are said to be in odd number and more than seven gifts in total. Some of the customary gifts include, a ring, a betel-leaf container, a complete set of clothes and fruits.

On this day the date for the wedding ceremony (akad nikah) and the various other conditions and requirements will be also confirmed by both parties. Once all such matters have been resolved, the bridegroom’s representatives will hand over all the gifts (hantaran) items with the exception of the engagement ring. The ring will be placed on the finger of the potential bride by an elder sister or aunt of the potential bridegroom. The potential bride will all this while be in her chamber.

The gifts from the family of the potential bride meant for the potential bridegroom are now handed to his representatives. The gift items may include a velvet cap (songkok), a prayer mat (sejadah) a pair of clothes and so on. The gifts must also be placed in an add number of trays, the number of trays being higher than those received from the potential bridegroom’s party. This completes the meminang ceremony.

Following the exchange of gifts a feast is given to the bridegroom’s party, before they leave for home.